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Geneffects

I write the software for Geneffects and tend bar at the Cat's Cradle in Carrboro, NC.

Monday, July 25, 2005

Customer Service

Ah, customer service! A couple of days ago I spent about an hour on the phone helping a family understand that the password for MuSing that I sent them in no way works as the password for WinZip. Still nothing has topped the repetetive hilarity of this email exchange:
Hi Brian,

I'm sorry, but this software is not what I expected. I am messing with right now. And reading up on it on what does what? It is easy to understand, but it just isn’t for me. Sorry, but I am not satisfied with this software. Go ahead and just give m my refund, as I know for sure that this software is not going to satisfy my music needs. Is that ok?


Brian,

How long will the refund take? And will it just be credited to my credit card, or how will that work? Please let me know because I do want my refund as I am not satisfied with the software. Thanks.


Brian,

Please email me back. And let me know about my refund, ok? Thanks.

I get all of the guy's emails, but it's the end of the day and I do not have time do his refund, so I send this email:
[person's name],

Office hours are past. I will get to your refund tomorrow.

These emails are waiting for me the next day:
Thank you.
Just wanted to remind you of my refund, thanks.
Brian,

Please let me know if you took care of my refund today. And is it going to be credited back to my credit card or how do yall handle refunds?


Hi Brian,

I am emailing you to see what is going on with my refund? Please email me back to let me know what is going on with it. I have been checking my credit card activity and still no refund. When should I be getting my refund?


Hi Brian,

What is going on with my refund that you said you would take care of? I have been emailing over and over and you just don’t respond to my emails. All I wanted to know was when I was getting my refund. And when I am to expect my refund. Please respond to my email and let me know. I know you have received all my emails because I requested a delivery receipt. You stated I could get my refund if I wasn’t happy with the product. And I told you I was unhappy with the product and not even close to be satisfied. You said ok, and you never got to my refund and never responded to my emails after that. I need my refund. So please email me back ASAP. I will expect an email tomorrow in the afternoon, so please email. I have not even been rude to yall or anything, and you still continue to treat me like my concerns don’t matter. This bothers me how you conduct business. I really hope you don’t treat your customers like this. I am sure you don’t, so please email me back and give me my refund that you said I could get.

Priceless!

3 Comments:

pinky said...

So, wait, what does this guy want from you? A refund or something?

8:12 PM  
Lance McCord said...

Your next move might be:

"Person, sorry for the delay! We just got back from the company retreat. There was email, but we were wasted most of the weekend, so I was afraid to type anything, you know?

"Anyway, I've assigned your case to the refunds department, where they should take care of you right away. If you have any trouble, email ___________ and give her the case number: OU812.

"Thanks for trying the software! Sorry it didn't work out for you. Cheers!"

Fill in the blank with another @geneffects email address that just goes to you; repeat the whole process.

9:31 PM  
Leigh said...

so did he get his refund?

5:56 PM  

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