Boner Machine
Now, we all know, that, in general, men are the sexual persuers. Women may make initial body cues, but, again in general, the guys take the action. Tonight however, under the freshly waxing moon, the girls were way hornier than the guys and it showed. Lauren's dog must have picked up on this, or was maybe just making a general political statement, and to my complete and silent glee he begins humping a poor dancing girl's leg. Seeing this unfold was quite a treat. At first there is shock. The girl, dancing by herself, suddenly finds that she has a partner. This shock quickly turns to awkwardness as there is not a predefined social protocol for this situation. Any other dog may have been kicked away without a thought, but this mutt has powerful connections. Lauren, the dogs owner, is also part owner of the club as well as a principal member in the performing band, Boner Machine. The final resolution was to keep on dancing as if there weren't a dog dry-humping her kneecap.
It kind of made me wonder. This girl whose leg was humped was pretty attractive, but do dogs really discriminate? Does a dog ever wake up in the morning, kind of hung over, then look over to the pillow next to him to see the ugliest leg he's ever laid eyes on?
5 Comments:
Hey Man,
Dogs deserve to get jiggy on the dance floor just as much as humans. Oh sure, rappers can call themselves dogs, people can write all kinds of songs about dogs, there are even dance moves called "the dog" yet a guy gets a little funk in him and decides to pay homage to a nice set of knees on the dance floor and the next thing you know he's being dissed on the world wide web.
Well, lemme tell ya something pal. Dogs are online now. We can type, email, surf, and even post mp3s that we've made with Garageband™ so watch out.
You gonna finsish that sandwich? Awwww cmon man....hook me up, drop it on the floor, drop it on the flooooooooooooor.
Yours Truly
Rover K. Nein
That dog was humping the girl's leg because it was BONER MACHINE playing! I mean... come on!!!
That dog is a a lady-dog so we must not consider this as humping traditional but rather a complicated love slide of rearward front oriented love sluicing i.e. grinding or perhaps bumping or rather to say that Dali wasn't humping maybe but dancing. remember Boner Machine is dance inducing number three local band voted by local radio dj machine and Dali loves boner machine as evidenced by her love of boner machine practice as well as boner machine pot luck leftovers
I love Dali...
...she is a hero and she is the best!
I was at a party with Lauren and having fun dancing, then Push It came on. Out of nowhere, her dog came and humped the hell out of my leg. I continued to dance.
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